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Dead molester, do I keep mouth shut or what?
Q: The person who molested me passed away just recently. He made my childhood and youth a living hell. In addition to the nights: you’re such a good boy, and spendt the days to terrorize my mother psychologically and nigths with physical violence against her. He managed to break her…(...)
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My story
Q: My question is if I should seek help? I’ve beenr eading some of the posts here, it helps reading what others have experienced. As for myself, I was molested by an older “pal” when I was around 6 years old. This went of for at least one year. I…(...)
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From a mother
Q: My son told me after all these years, he’s 19 now, that he was subjected to sexual abuse from when he was 7 til 12 years old. This Christmas was a nightmare. We’ve reported to the police and gotten a lawyer to help us in this case. But I…(...)
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Things suggesting that I’ve been molested
Q: I’m a 28 year old man, who recently have begun to remember happenings from my childhood. Things suggesting that I’ve been molested. I’ve read here that some have had good use of residental care. What does it mean? I’m wondering if it’s something that could fit me, because I…(...)
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Sexually abused by my mother
Q: I was sexually abused by my mother when I was a boy. Through all my life, I’ve had problems to find a balance in relation to women. I want to be in a relationship, but feeling the ambivalence between girlfriend vs mother. I don’t wish that my girlfriend to become…(...)
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I almost can’t take it anymore
Q: I was molested when I was 13-14 years old. The feeling always linger, but I’ve managed to think about something else and do other things, like buying a lot of weird stuff, which has put a dent on my economy. I almost can’t take it anymore now, and I…(...)
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My sibling won’t believe me
Q: I’m a 60 year old man. My father molested me when I was a little boy. He died several years ago. My younger sisters refuse to believe that our father molested me and don’t want to have anything to do with me. What can I do to establish a…(...)
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Smart first step?
Q: I was subjected to sexual abuse in my childhood. Now I’m and adult and still ahven’t sought any for of help, but I often think that I shuold do it. What would you advise me to do, as a first step? A: Hi and thank you for the…(...)
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Self harm – sexual behaviour
Q: I’m wondering if it’s just a coinsidence that men who’ve been “severely” sexually abused as a child get behavioral problems as an adult? If they get aroused by sadism, feel pain, be humiliated or sexually abused if it’s related to their “childhood”? Eagerly awaiting your answer. Regards A A:…(...)
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Molested at Helgelands Kysten
Q: We were several young boys who were molesetd by a homosexual paedofile male. Most of them are having and have had great difficulties as an adult. Two of them are dead, this is far too early. I don’t know if I’ve gotten any damage from it, but I have…(...)
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Pocket Man, Catholic priests etc. Must we talk about these things?
Q: I think there’s a lot of focus on abuse now days. Pocket Man, Catholic priests etc. Must we talk about these things? A: This is an issue we’ll never get rid of. There will always be children who are deprives of their dignity. But as adults, it is our…(...)
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I know that I’m heterosexual
Q: I know I’m heterosexual, but why does my body fail me when I sleep with men? A: It’s easy for an adult to “push the right buttons” in a bubbly boy’s body. This is also something the abuser know how to exploit to justify their selfishness. Regards Ronny(...)
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I have thoughts and fantasies that scare me
Q: I have thoughts and fantasies that scares me. Just think about if other poeple could see how I am on the inside. Why do I feel like a monster? A: We are many who have experiences things during growing up that only adults should choose or not. Equality is…(...)
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Dreading to call a support center
Q: I’m dreading to call a center. I’m not sure if it’s right for me. What should I expect? A: Those who work at the centers in Norway have knowledge and experience with all forms of late effects and traumas. They know that different forms of abuse, large or small,…(...)
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17 year old boy
Q: I’m a 17 year old boy who’s been sexually abused by a family member. I haven’t told anyone, about what happened when I was 12 years old. My days are characterized by anger, frustration and drugs. How can I make my everydays better, and who can I talk to?…(...)
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Hating life
Q: How is it possible to get rid of the guilt, shame, angst, fear, depression, flashbacks, nightmares, etc? I was subjected to sexual abuse for 3 years, from when I was 10-13 years old. There were 3 boys who were molesting me. One of them was 3 years older, the…(...)
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Upset and “relieved”
Q: I’m a 40 year old male. I’ve been struggling in 24 years after what I was put through, and I don’t know who the molester was. I’ve been told all tehse years I can’t file a repost because I do not know who the molester was, is this true?…(...)
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My new friend
Q: Hi, I need some advice regarding something. I’ve just befriended this great guy who experienced a lot of pain when growin up. He was emotionally abused by his mother and sexually abused by his sister. He takes initiative for physical closeness when we meet, after talking for a while…(...)
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Struggling with sex
Q: I am a 37 year old man and having struggles with sex. I’ve always been sexually aggressive since I became sexually active. I’ve had many partners and been proud of that I am what I call a “giver” in the act. I’ve always secured my partners satisfaction before my…(...)
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Making myself «finished»
Q: Hi – I’ve known about your website for a while – but today I saw the two of you on TV2. First of all I’ve only good things to say about the initiative you’ve taken. I’m writing you because I’m wondering if it’s possible to be “finished” with having…(...)
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Few friends
Q: I was abused as a child, but fortunately received help with the psyche, but I am struggling to become friends with males, I kind of don’t know what to do or say. I am skeptical towards men and having difficulties trusting them. How can I get over this fear?…(...)
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Abuse from stepfather
Q: Hi. I’m a 33 year old man who has lived with sexual abuse by my stepfather from the age of 9 til 30 years old. My situation is a bit special in that it’s been going on for so long, without me being able to get out of this…(...)
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What and when does it count as abuse?
Q: I’ve been experiencing different things with older boys from when I was 7 years old. I’m talking about boys 6-7 years older than me. It started when I as a 7 years old had to watch an older boy masturbate and another time I had to watch with his…(...)
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I feel some kind of shame
Q: Hi! I’ve written to you before, because I was subjected to sexual abuse from when I was 13-16 + when I was 19 years old, I was unfortunately victim of other boys/men then… I feel some kind of shame. Not interested in sex etc. Is it normal? Boy 23.5…(...)
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Steeled anxiety
Q: Man in the middle of life, sexually assaulted by a male family friend in early childhood. Full penetration, oralsex and emotional chaos for five years. I didn’t know what pedophilia was. A little boy thought a full grown man was his boyfriend. The offender was my secret, which I…(...)
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Molested by teacher in middle school
Molested by teacher in middle school Q: I was molested by my male homeroom teacher several times in middle school. I’ve repressed this for many years, but I met him again for the first time at a 20 years anniversary class reunion party for middle school, and have been struggling…(...)
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Abuse
Q: Hi! I’ve been subjected to rape, abuse and such for many years. I told this to my doctor. He denies that health personnel commit abuse. I was raped by someone in the psychiatry ward. It’s been reported, but it’s words against words. :/ I’m wondering who I can talk…(...)
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What is abuse?
Q: My husband met a woman in a music group. She was stuck on him, praised him and complimented him. Suddenly everything was woeful, she had a painful childhood and marriage and needed a lot of help in the house. He was about to leave one night and she kissed…(...)
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Molested during childhood and as an adult
Q: Hi, I’m struggling with shame and guilt because I was molested by my godfather in my childhood, both oral- and analsex, I’m struggling and it bothers me daily. Then I was abused orally and analy by a colleague. Two failed marriages, have 5 children, feel unsuccessful, am on sick…(...)
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Choosing a support-center
Q: I live outside Oslo, but can I chose going to the center in Oslo as I feel the offer in Buskerud is insufficient? A: Hi and thanks for the e-mail. Yes you can and I recommend SSMM, which is exclusively for men. It’s located at Storgata in Oslo and…(...)
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What do I do next?
Q: I’m sitting among acquaintances and having a conversation about abuse in the family and during childhood. I would like to go further with the subject. It’s possible that I’ve been subjected to sexual abuse. How would you consult me further? A: Hi and thank you for the e-mail! Many…(...)
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Was he molested by his father as a child?
Q: Hi. I know a 40 year old man and I think he’s been molested by his father. Not necessarily sexual, but related to sex one way or another, which now have turned into a form of self-loathing and difficulties maintaining normal interpersonal relationships. His economy is not good, which…(...)
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Have I been molested?
Q: Hi. I’ve been wondering for some time now if I’ve been molested when I was 6 til 11 years old. I have a mentally disabled uncle, whom we used to visit once or twice a year. He would take places to do something, then he would convince me to…(...)
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Worried mother
Q: I’ve just become a mother to a lovely little boy and wishing him all the good of life. It’s scares me that 5% of boys have been subjected sexual abuse and 85% of these assaults are by someone the child knows. What can I do as a mother to…(...)
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Vacation in Spain
Q: Hi! I was subjected to sexual abuse in Spain when I was 14 years old. I was in a shop selling purses to buy something for my sister. The owner got me into the backroom where I performed oral sex on him. What’s been bothering me is that I…(...)
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Subjected to sexual abuse
Q: I was a victim of sexual abuse in my childhood by two men. I’ve been to court and both were convicted. One of them got 9 years and 6 month in jail and the other 1 year and 4 months. I’ve been in and out of psychiatric care where…(...)
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Telling for the first time
Q: I’ve become an “accomplished” adult man in his 40s. I was raped by a door to door salesperson when I was 9 years old. I’ve been doing well, but always wondered if there’s a chance that I’ll become a rapist myself… Reasoned with that many abusers themselves have been…(...)